Pablo Veron, known from the movie ‘The Tango Lesson’ and a maestro who regularly visits Brussels, had a very unpleasant encounter recently with a Russian woman who wouldn’t take no for an answer.
It was a Saturday night, I finished a whole day of workshops and I was exhausted because I took a plane at 5AM from LA the same day. I went anyway to ANM to enjoy the company of a few friends that insisted I go and relax a bit, talking and dancing. So I was sitting with my friends in the corner and that woman (NB) came at me from across the floor with the purpose that she must dance with me. She could not accept I did not say yes, even with her aggressive way of asking. One could hardly imagine she’s so sophisticated and elegant like Jurgen says, with her red scarlet dress, walking hard toward me through the middle of the floor where people where dancing, Interrupting abruptly the conversation I had with my friends, she spoke loudly and rudely to me, asked if I was Pablo Veron and said that she wanted to dance.
My instinctive self protecting reaction was to say “No, I’m not†and my friends start to say the same, that I’m a guy that looks like him. They had the feeling right away that I was embarrassed and felt in a very uncomfortable situation. She ask me for lessons and I say that tomorrow, Sunday, I’ll give a workshop, she could consult with Karina Romero, the organizer. She says, “No, I want a lesson now, I want you to dance with me now,†and I explained to her, traditionally, in tango that it does not work that way, and Rosa also made an intervention saying so as well. She says, “I am from Russia and that’s the way it works in my country,†and just kept insisting saying “I’m here to dance with you, come dance with me now†using her finger in a very offensive manner to describe the way I should come from my chair to her.
At this point I suggested she to go to her table and to think about how she should invite people to dance. She says that I did not want to dance with her because I am an egomaniac, self centered, selfish and a f-ing pig. Seeing that the situation she was creating was just stupid, and believing that we become what we create, from my thoughts I murmured that she was stupid. Putting on incredible face of witch, she slapped me with no hesitation. Seated and with my back to the wall with nowhere to go, my automatic and reflexive reaction was to slap her back in defense. Immediately after, I regretted my reaction and wished I had found a different way to deal with all that.She started to make a big scandal, coming to me again and again, trying to kick me 5 times aiming between my legs where it hurts a man the most. Beating me, while I was trying to stop her with the internal decision of not engaging her anymore. I had help of some people just after 2 or 3 eternal minutes. I believe that the show was so shocking and pathetic that nobody could react, staying frozen without believing their eyes. (…)
(via tango-blog.com)
The lady in question should remember, that:
- normally it’s the men/leaders that invite. It’s not a crime if the woman/follower does it, but in some cases it can be regarded as impolite.
- maestros already dance a lot and get invited all the time, so the chances of him/her saying ‘no’ are real.
- but most of all: it’s called an invitation for a reason: the other party has to accept it, or not. It is not a right, not an order.
I don’t know Pablo personally, not the woman who aggressed him, nor her side of the story. There are certainly a lot of facts and nuances to this story that I am not aware of. But I would have hated to be in Pablo’s shoes.
